Spoiled baby

[Anonymous]

What do you say to people who suggest you’re “spoiling” your LO when
you hold her when she cries? Especially our little GERDlings? My LO
seems to like to be held while you’re standing so much more than when
you’re sitting, and I have a theory that it has something to do with
gravity or something but my husband says I’m just spoiling her. I wish
I had something snazzy to say to him.

[Anonymous]

Just tell him you can’t spoil a baby! And leave it at that.

[Anonymous]

You can’t spoil a baby! For what it’s worth, we held Kaelyn constantly when she was a baby. She wouldn’t sleep unless one of us was holding her. She was rarely put down for the first nine months of her life. She screamed most of the time anyways, but putting her down just guaranteed that we’d have even more screaming. Yet, she is now a stubbornly independent four year that shows no signs of having been “spoiled”. Her favorite phrase is “I can do it myself!”, yet she is also incredibly affectionate and loving as well. pkkb2008-12-22 21:22:33

[Anonymous]

I try to leave it at that but he’s a stubborn MAN and thinks that everything he does is right and everything I do is wrong. (Geez I think I married my father.) LOL. I wish I could find some scientific evidence why babies like it better being held and how it correlates to independence. I held my first son as much as I can, and while he wasn’t a reflux baby and rarely cried, he got held a lot and is now the most INDEPENDANT and non-cuddly 8yo boy I’ve ever met. (Tho he does act like a spoiled brat sometimes when it comes time to playing video games or sharing his toys with other kids LOL.)

[Anonymous]

my best “DR. HOUSE” advice is to say, “you’re an idiot.” ok, i know that doesn’t help, but, since Dr. House is my new hero, that’s the best i can do.LOL!!!

[Anonymous]

Lmao! I love House. I say that all the time anyway lol!

[hellbennt]

This gets me SO MAD!

go look at http://www.thebabywearer.com/forum

and see a whole WORLD of people holding their babies!!

I wore jonah AND ari a LOT and they are perfectly IDEPENDENT!!!!!

babies let you KNOW when they don’t want to be held!!

holding baby often https://www.infantreflux.org/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=5793&KW=dr+sears

there IS proof- google ‘Attachment Parenting’!

hellbennt2008-12-23 08:24:08

[Anonymous]

Babies definitely like the be held while you’re standing… hence, babywearing (as Laura already eluded to). I wore Evan 8-12 hours/day for the first 4 months (& still wear him some & hold him often)… & though I can’t tell you if he’s an ‘independent child’ yet (he’s only 7 mths old) I CAN tell you that he is a happy, independent baby that is able to play by himself on the floor for up to 30-45 min if I need him to (ie: am making dinner, wrangling Brodie, etc).

Bottom line: you’re mommy & trust your instincts… also, it’s ridiculous to think one can spoil a baby (sorry to call your dh ridiculous, but it’s just not true).

HTH

[hellbennt]

Ramsey:

ok just to let you know, I was not yelling at YOU…

I wasn’t even yelling at your dh…just hopping mad at the

subject matter…

[Anonymous]

LOL Laura, I knew you weren’t yelling at me. 😉 It gets me hopping mad too. For some reason the mere mention of a “spoiled” baby gets under my skin. Now, older children is a totally different story… but these lil guys are too young to even know what manipulation is. And I don’t know why I can’t get it thru my DH’s head.

I actually wear LO a lot myself….

And believe it or not, hubs does too…

But it does make me wonder, what is SO different about being held/worn while Mom/Dad is STANDING vs. sitting down and being held….

[hellbennt]

well, it’s not a new phenomenon: hmm…

https://www.infantreflux.org/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=381&KW=hellbennt

my 2.5yr old (non refluxer) STILL demands “uppie uppie!!” and I must stand with HIM, too…(not all day or anything, lol! but it IS a request of his

[Anonymous]

I think the standing thing definitely has to do with gravity, although I’ve never come across a “scientific” explanation to this. Just my own experience that my children could burp so much better and were more comfortable with me holding them while standing. I also held my first one ALL the time and he’s very independent now. Good luck with DH, sometimes people just can’t be convinced. I had to just do what I wanted with my first and trust my instincts and my dh has seen the proof — and now with our second (and second refluxer) I hear him saying to her, “I know it hurts, let’s get that burp out” or whatever while he is patting her , standing up and holding her. He’s completely on board for not letting her lay down and for holding her upright as much as possible. good luck! Oh, and Dr. Sears: http://www.askdrsears.com has tons of info on babywearing and how beneficial it is for both baby and parents.

[Author]

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