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I haven’t been on the boards in a while with our entire extended families having descended on us for two weeks, and the start of pre-school….I can’t believe Lucas is 2 now! Anyway, I have to post that Lucas has been weaned a few weeks before turning 2. It actually went pretty well, I was shocked. He seemed to immediately began sleeping better and I felt horrible thinking that I’ve kept up nursing for so long thinking it was good for him and here he was sleeping even better after being weaned. I also started to wonder what kind of poison was really lurking in my breastmilk that even on a very carefully monitored dairy/soy/gluten/beef free diet he was so affected!! Then after about three weeks, he started in on a teething jag again and we were back to the frequent night wakings. I am just so amazed to think at how much misery teething has caused our family….it’s just beyond my understanding.
So, I’m writing to report that in general, his sleeping has improved a great deal in the last two months (even before weaning it was beginning to improve again….just getting bigger? Who knows why). This has all been such a learning experience (I say that now on a full nights sleep) but I truly couldn’t have made it mentally without the wonderful mothers on this board. I credit you all with my sanity, my child’s health and my marriage as still intact!!!
And to ANYONE with a child who won’t sleep, with a hiatal hernia or severe reflux, or food intolerances or whatever, who feels it will truly NEVER end, don’t give up hope. It took me two years to have more than two nights in a row with more than 4 hours of sleep in a block. The flip side is that when you start sleeping again, you’ll be bouncing off the walls from even minimal amounts of “normal” sleep.
I feel like we’re not out of the woods yet, still on high doses of Zegerid and he has failed the beginnings of food trials, but at least he is sleeping. I can’t ask for more at this point. It’s truly the best news we’ve had in so long.
Great news, Anne. I’m so happy you are finally getting some sleep. I agree with you on the teeting thing. My first was a horrible, miserable teether. But fortunatley she got all her teeth one right after another and was pretty much done by 16 months or so. Myles is cutting molars now and he’s a bear. He’s up at 4 am almost every morning and won’t go back to sleep until around 5:30 or 6, and the dh gets up at 6:40 and wakes him up while getting ready for work. I’m getting a lot more sleep than you were, but I’m pretty tired. And I’m sick of the teething monster.
I hope Lucas continues to sleep well, and hopefully outgrows some of his food intolerances soon.
It’s nice of you to take the time to encourage all the tired mommies out there.
So glad things are workinig out!
Anne,
All I can say is YIPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! Sleep, glorious sleep!! Thanks so much for posting! I often think of you guys and Hailey and Lucas sound so similar (minus the feeding aversion). I’m so happy to hear all your good news… some sleep and an intact marriage. If we’re there on those points at age 2 then I’ll be one happy momma! You’ve just offered me a ray of hope….
Anne ~ Wo hoo! I’m so happy to have caught your post! I’m even more happy to hear all of the good news! Sounds like things are going so great for you guys! It’s amazing when you finally turn that corner and know that things are going to be ok. Isn’t 2 so much fun! I’m enjoying every second.
P.S. Enjoy all of that sleep!
StaceyThanks for all your kind words, guys. It’s great to feel hopeful again, and not so down-trodden about the whole having a baby experience. I was even letting go of the idea of having more children thinking if this one never sleeps….how will I do this again? So the getting better part is great for sleep, but even better for hope and for hte idea of having more than one child, which seemed like lunacy even a few months ago. No trying for #2 here, though. I need a year of eating what I want and sleep and then I can think about having #2.
Lori, just in case this is useful to you in any form, or to anyone trying to wean or back off gently from nursing their toddler, or interested in changing a bed-time ritual, I’m going to give you WAAY more detail than you need.
To answer your question… I employed dh– which I should have done long long ago, into our bed-time ritual. I asked him to help beginning to put Lucas down, which he had never done, (not that he was unwilling, I was unwilling and had horrible breast issues, so skipping feedings during the first year wasn’t a good idea). The kid had literally always nursed to sleep (or the car could put him to sleep, but we had never relied on driving him to get him to sleep). As you know, you are WAY too tired to do anything different once you are so bound up in the horrible no sleep cycle. So, the first night it took dh nearly two hours before Lucas dropped from sheer exhaustion– he read and told him stories until he dropped. There was also a lot of crying, which before now I was unwilling to get through. But I’m fortunate dh didn’t give up. But dh works an evening shift, so he isn’t around for 4-5 nights of the week. Then I began trying to put him to sleep without nursing– there was also a lot of crying with me. I had noticed that he had occasionally in the recent months fallen back asleep on a handful of occasions without nursing, so this gave me a glimmer of hope. He was also getting sick of sucking on anything, hating sippy cups, hating straws (unless in a favorite smoothie)….so it dawned on me that nursing is that same sucking motion.
I also coincidentally had a yeast infection on my nipples (which was like adding insult to injury after all this time nursing to have a problem like this at the end). In the end, it proved our saving grace!! I started explaining to him that “mommy has an owie on her susu” (our word for breast/nursing). I showed him how I put medicine and a bandaid on myself and would go through this explanation every time he asked to nurse. Then we started asking him why he couldn’t nurse nad he’d say “mommy has owie on susu, it hurts. mommy put medicine on susu, mommy put bandaid on susu.” He asked every day for “susu”, LOOOOOOONG after hte last day of nursing. Every time he asked we’d go into this “what did mommy tell you about her susu?” Just yesterday he started saying “mommy has owie on susu” and went into the whole thing and I laughed thinking, he still thinks I am wearing bandaids and everything…
So, after the yeast infection thing started, I would let 48 hrs go between sessions, to give my breasts some room to adjust. I was terrified of breast problems since I had weird problems for the first year. Anyway, then one day I just thought this is it, and we went cold turkey. Now he goes to sleep with us telling him stories in the dark, after the whole bath/reading books thing is over. It was definitely more than a month of transition time and getting him to sleep has taken a LOT LONGER, but things are starting to get better, and I’m getting enough sleep that it doesn’t matter as much if it takes extra energy to put him down.
Again, sorry if this is too much detail!!
I can’t remember if you are able to have dh put Hailey down? I can’t believe how wonderful it is and I think it was my sleep deprived foggy mind that really couldn’t let go of the idea that it would ruin entire nights of sleep if he put him down. That and I didn’t want the whole crying for two hours part to get Lucas all worked up and make the night or the reflux worse. I don’t know why I didn’t get more help earlier. But THAT’s a whole other posting topic!! haha.
You’re a genius!! An owie on your susu! The only down side I can see is that you’ll probably be in a restaurant one day and he’ll tell the waitress (an everyone within earshot) that “mommy has an owie on her susu!” LOL Imagine the looks you’ll get.
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