do i nurse every time he wakes at night?

[Anonymous]

i just had yet another night of waking very hour with finn. it’s been this way for the past six weeks with an occasional 2 or 3 hour stretch.

i know that he’s waking in discomfort or pain b/c he’ll wake up writhing with intestinal pain or coughing. he will mostly go right back to sleep after nursing, but once a night he awakens for 1-2 hours. he’s usually not in pain during this time, he’s just wide awake. he sleeps next to our bed in an amby bed.

i know that many (most) of you are also experiencing this or have in the past..
I have a couple of questions–
I nurse him every time he wakes up. Am I making it worse? i know that he’s not hungry, nursing is how he is comforted, but it seems like all of that eating at night would certainly affect the reflux and intestinal discomfort. i do it because it is what calms him down. if dh tries to rock him back to sleep he screams until he gets to nurse.
so…if you do think that the nursing is hurting rather than helping, how do i go about changing that? help! i just want to do what is best for finn, and i’m so sleep deprived i can’t even think clearly.

[Anonymous]

Oh Colleen, I am so sorry you are so sleep deprived. I remember this deprivation with both boys.

I wish I had more advice in the nursing/TED area. Maybe someone will chime in. It just sounds like there is something in your diet that is still bothering him. I know that isn’t what you want to hear. 🙁 The intestinal pain/writhing sounds a lot like Landen before we got his intolerances under control. Even on meds, he was just miserable until he went Elemental. I am not sure where you are at in the TED diet (if you have a baseline and are adding foods back in, etc) or if you are just elim’ing the major offenders. I do remember one poster on here that found out after *many* months of TED that her baby was intolerant or allergic to turkey & rice which are supposed to be “safe” foods, so anything is possible. Also, my son, Landen is intolerant to rice as well as Sheri (MFPIx2) son, Ben. Some of those “safe” foods can bother them!

I am sure NONE of that helped at all! I just wanted to give you some ideas.

You will get through this!!! HUGS HUGS HUGS!!!!!

p.s. when my first born comfort fed like that, I always fed him. If he overate, he puked. I am not sure if it was right or wrong, but like Finn it was the only thing that would settle him down. Neither of my boys slept for ANY measurable amount of time until they were comfy so I know how you feel.

[Anonymous]

thanks jill– that’s how i feel about it…if it’s the only thing that will comfort him, i feel like i need to nurse him–but i would hate to be making it all worse–b/c at night the refluxing certainly wakes him up and causes him pain.
ugh. i just want him to feel better, and for us all to get some sleep.

[Anonymous]

Hi Colleen-I just posted an update about my LO in the Sleeping forum (you had posted a reply to me a few days ago).

Anyway, I just can’t get over how much this sounds like us. I just don’t know what to do or how to fix it. Like you, I really think something is causing her to move around and wake up like she does, but I don’t know what. In the beginning, when we were first dealing with the reflux disease, it was obvious when it was the reflux causing the pain because of the way she would cry, scream, arch during feedings, etc. But now I just don’t know because at night, for the most part, she isn’t doing any of those behaviors at all. She’s just waking constantly and writhing around a lot. Also, like you said it’s every 1-2 hours and she’ll wake up for 1-3 hours and just be wide awake.

I have the same worries that you do…about should I feed her or is that worse? But a couple of times I have tried to not feed her the minute she wakes up and she just loses it (then she’s definitely wide awake). And, if she is bothered by her stomach or something I feel like I should feed her if it makes her feel better. Right?!?

Sorry…I’m not much help. But I wanted to say I am really feeling for you. When I look back at her calendar this every 1 hour thing started probably about 3 months old and she’s almost 8 now . It’s so tough not getting any sleep (for her, me, and DH!). All of the experienced mommas say it will get better, and I’m sure it will. We’ll make it through this and be all the better mommas for it .

[Anonymous]

Colleen,

I remember days like that. I was lucky that McKenzie once she went to sleep would sleep, but I remember nights it taking me three hours to get her to sleep and all she wanted to do was eat. It does sound like there might still be something in your diet that is bothering Finn. However, this is what I would say about nursing him when he wakes up. First of all, BM is a natural antacid so there is something to be said about that. Second, I would say do whatever it takes to make him comfortable. Have you tried cosleeping? I said I would never do that, but then along came McKenzie and I got much more sleep when she slept with me.

Destiny, have you tried Neocate/Elecare yet? Still having waking up like that for five months, I think it might be worth a try.. Good luck everyone!

[Anonymous]

Neocate/Elecare…yeah, I think that is going to be my next course of action! It’s worth a shot. It can’t hurt anything right? I’ll keep everyone udpated.

I second co-sleeping. I was never one that thought I would either (love the cuddly time with DH) plus our LO’s nursery is actually a small sitting room that is attached to our room. But, when she got her, it was a different story like you said. For the first one month she slept in a bassinette next to our bed. But then that is when her GERD really flared up and she has really having a horrible time. And DH had to start back to work. So I started sleeping downstairs with her in the swing or on me. That lasted for a couple of months. Then I had to go back to work part-time so DH and I started “taking shifts” during the night and found it was so much easier to just have her there with us. If we are getting up every hour it’s easier to be right there next to her rather than getting up to walk to the crib each time. Plus I like to think it’s comforting to her in some way, even if she’s not feeling well. And the more I read, there are some benefits to co-sleeping that I had never even thought of.

I don’t know if we’re doing the “right” thing or not, but it’s working the best for all of us now!

[hellbennt]

colleen, I cannot remember where you ‘are’ on the TED…

this might help?

Milk allergy/night wakings/lLoveMySophia: https://www.infantreflux.org/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=10017&KW=

[Anonymous]

thanks everyone–
cosleeping: we pretty much half co-sleep– finn sleeps in an amby right next to the bed, but ends up with us for part of the night. he looks so comfy in the amby–i want to sleep in it. when he was born we started out co-sleeping exclusively, but the reflux led us to use the ‘co-sleeper’ so we could elevate the mattress-head. then someone gave us the amby.
question– i can’t seem to get the side-nursing position right. i’m totally uncomfortable in it. I do drape him over me while on my back and try to sleep/nurse that way–but i sleep horribly while doing it. any suggestions?

Laura–I did the strict TED for 2.5 weeks–the grunting stopped but we still had mucousy diapers and intestinal pain (we switched from solutabs at the same time). Since I’ve started NAET treatments, I have adjusted my diet according to what my dr. tells me is ok/not ok (see https://www.infantreflux.org/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=11879)
finn’s intolerance tests (for dairy, soy, wheat and corn) came up negative, but he’s still showing up for allergy/sensitivity to some of these items–so i’m not eating them. She’s been treating his milk sensitivity…and it seems to be a tough one.

last thing–(i’ll post on this separately too). finn has a hydrocele (fluid filled testicles that usually goes down before birth or in the first week post-partum). this can sometimes indicate or cause (?) a hernia which could be linked to reflux. so far the dr. has told us that there is no symptom of hernia (ie: no lump), but I wonder. our new dr. told us that this is the largest hydrocele that he’s seen– anyone have experience with this?

thanks for your help!

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