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Oh dear, I don’t even know what to say about the first couple of paragraphs! I feel horrible for you, but you are still here and you still have your husband and daughter! That’s everything, although I can’t say I have had a “dream home”, or mercedes or porsche, I have my family and that’s the best thing I can have!!
Now as for you child sleeping, my mom used to tell me that my son was an angel for her. She wanted to make me feel better, when I was in the middle of “THIS CRAP” I like to call reflux and my son was MSPI, we thought he had everything from a hole in his heart to Cystic Fibrosis and he had tests for all of them. My entire maternity leave and then some was filled with tests and hospital visits and I wished almost everyday that I had never had another child. I lost a lot of weight and I am already a small person, my hair fell out, I had panic attacks that I was afraid to tell anyone about because I wanted to be able to take care of this “myself”!!Even if your daughter does sleep a little better for your aunt, it’s called “luck” and it probably wouldn’t happen consistently.She is less than a month old, that is how babies are. They sleep only about 3 hours at a time. I didn’t read your other post, but does she seem to be in pain?? If so I would possibly ask for a PPI like Prevacid because Zantac is weight sensitive and does not seem to work well for “severe” reflux babies.You are the mom, it took me awhile with my first son to realize that and then one day I was like “oh yeah” that’s why he wants me! I’M HIS MOM!!!!!! You are not inadequate, you are not failing, you are learning with her what it’s like to be in this great big world together!!! Good luck!!I was so sad reading your post!! I can actually relate to losing everything so I know how hard that is. My son had severe reflux too & MSPI and I got called out of work all of the time just b/c the daycare couldn’t handle his screaming. Then in Sept. (b/c he was so prone to colds and EI’s b/c he always had fluid in his head from reflux) he quickly got RSV and was hospitalized. Would my job of 10 yrs sympathize and work with me? Nope, I was FIRED. We were paying out of pocket for neocate and we had to put our home (nicest home we ever owned) on the market and it STILL hasn’t sold!!
We’re renting now. BUT, every day I look at my babies and my husband and just feel so thankful. There is a reason I lost my job- and it was to be here for my kids. I thank the Lord for each day!! We still miss our house though!!! lolI couldn’t agree more on getting your baby on a PPI drug. And don’t let people make you feel crazy. I’ve heard it all from doctors to family members. “It’s colic”, “it’s maternal anxiety” (HECK YEAH YOU GET ANXIETY WHEN YOUR BABY NEVER SETTLES AND SCREAMS 24-7!!!) lol. Like Erica I lost a lot of weight (and I am thin anyway-so it was noticeable) and that was when my MIL said “maybe YOU have PPD and the baby senses it”
Hang in there. This is one of the toughest times. Like I’ve said to other moms: God gives reflux babies to the women that can handle it, because they need us!! You are a great mommy. Keep fighting for your baby!I’m so sorry about all you’ve been through. I can really relate to what you said about being a rock until now. I know exactly what you mean. I’d been through alot before I had my kids and considered myself to be a strong person. Until I had my reflux babies. I can honestly say that caring for my refluxers was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. It’s just so draining, emotionally and physically, and you can’t help but doubt yourself when you see happy babies everywhere.
Oh and I heard all the stupid comments too. My dh was completely insensitive and non-supportive. He continually told me that my babies cried, wouldn’t eat, or even threw up, because they sensed I was stressed!! Oh, and of course most of their symptoms were all in my mind. Well I must have a very vivid imaginiation because my daughter rarely slept more than 20 minutes at at time all night long. Was it my stress waking her up every 20 minutes even though she was in her own room? She wouldn’t eat unless she was tightly swaddled and I walked the floors with the bottle in her mouth. Was it my imaginiation that every time I sat down with her she quit eating and started screaming? Give me a break!! Oh and my son was a puker. He splattered the walls with puke multiple times each day. My dh had the audacity to tell me he was puking because I was tense!! Oh and I guess it was my imaginiation when my son quit taking a bottle altogether. It must have been a delusion that the only way he would eat is if I spoon fed him expressed breast milk. “OK, dear, I’m nuts!” Ignore all these stupid comments and trust your motherly instincts. Anyway, things really did improve for my son once he was on Prevacid. His pain stopped and he was happier. Hang in there and push for answers and solutions. (Zantac does not have a very good track record for helping babies with reflux. Many of us have had better luck with Prevacid, or the other PPI meds. http://www.marci-kids.com )ndrose2008-04-12 10:19:36
That’s great that your doc’s child had reflux – hopefully that will make her more sympathetic to your plight. You might want to print and fax (or take) the http://www.marci-kids information with you to your next appt. My doc didn’t want to prescribe a high enough dose and I had to fight for it. The marci-kids info did sway her though.
Yes, both of my refluxers outgrew it at 9 months. It was a long 9 months.My refluxers hated the swing, bouncy seat, car, etc. also. Ellie liked the carrier though (baby wearing). I forgot which one I had, but Laura often suggests baby wearing with some kind of sling. Have you tried that? Laura’s link (Groupie Intro) probably has some babywearing links.Good luck with getting Prevacid for Isabella. It really has helped lots of babies on this site, including my little guy!
Well, I didn’t know about marci-kids when I first took Myles to the doc. She suggested Prevacid but only gave him a dosage of 1/4 solutab a day which is pitifully too little. I sought help on this board because he was not improving. I found marci-kids (via this site) and mentioned it to my doc. She was not impressed initially and said I could give him 1/2 a solutab a day, still not enough. I tried it for a while but he was only getting worse. I called many, many times asking for a higher dose and reporting that he was getting worse. Finally I printed the info (I don’t remember all that I sent but it was not just the dosage info…there was stuff about their research, info on PPI’s in general, and a document that explained how PPI’s work and how safe they are) I sent it to her and then called again to see if she got the info. She said she did and that I could go ahead and try the marci-kids dose.
I remember specifically that she said something like, “Well, these meds are non-toxic, so go ahead and try it.” I’m sure that probably came from one of the pages I sent her from marci-kids which explains that these drugs are very specific and only work on the actual cells in the body that produce acid; therefore it’s nearly impossible to over dose on them and side effects are very minimal. Within days of being on the higher dose Myles was a new baby!! Phew! It’s was a lot of work convincing his doctor but it was worth every aggravating minute! That’s great that she liked the carrier today. My middle child was a very difficult baby. She hated everything except being carried around in my arms all day. I was exhausted and worried, but you know, she turned out to be the easiest toddler I’ve ever known. No tantrums, happy all the time, pleasant and easy going. An absolute doll! So, hang in there. You never know….. I think Ellie was just miserable because she was in pain all the time, and she was anxious by nature. Once her pain was gone, and she got old enough to realize mommy was never going to leave her and that she was safe in this crazy world, her dispositon changed completely. Good luck with doctor. I hope things improve soon.
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