Infantreflux.org | Myles’ one year check up

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September 26, 2006 at 1:51 pm #14299

Anonymous
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Well, we just got back from Myles’ check up. My head is spinning from all the negative things I heard.

1. He probably has an oral aversion and should be evaluated. (She’s willing to wait until he’s 15 months old). She thinks he should be self feeding more and taking a sippy cup. I know many babies, probably most babies, are self feeding and using a sippy cup by now, but does it always point to an aversion if they are not? My second child was the same way. She didn’t self feed until she was 18 months old. Still she turned out to be a very good eater.

2. His stranger anxiety is extreme for his age. He cried or screamed the entire time we were there even when no one was touching him. He did the same thing at Kindermusik last night even though I was holding him the entire time.

3. He should be off the bottle. He only takes one bottle a day; right before bed. I don’t see why that’s a bad thing at 12 months old.

4. He should be on whole milk instead of Good Start 2. I really don’t think it’s a good idea to switch him to whole milk when he’s only been on good start for a short time. For Pete’s sake he’s only been off breast milk for a week!! I don’t even know if he has any milk or lactose issues yet. Plus he’s not a good eater so I thought the formula would be better until he’s eating better.

5. He will likely always have sluggish bowels and need lots of fiber to keep things moving. Great. But then she also said I shouldn’t be spoon feeding him his fruits, veggies and added fluids. The kid would end up impacted if I didn’t feed him the right foods.

Otherwise, he’s fine. He’s 30 3/4 inches tall (90%), 22lbs.7 ounces (50%), and has a big head (90%). His ears were fine, so his crabbiness is likely due to teething.

So, what do you all think. Should I be conerned???

September 26, 2006 at 2:10 pm #14301

Anonymous
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No way Christine, it sounds like everythings just fine to me, I’d keep on top of the oral aversion, but my oldest was like yuors, he rarely self fed, wasn’t because he couldn’t but because he prefered not to. I tend to agree with you on the formula thing. I mean give it a little time!! you can always slowly slowy start weaning him off the goodstart in the future . My older NEVER drank whole milk, actually he hardly drank milk at all, after age one I only really nursed him at night or if he was sick or cranky…He just didn’t like milk. His doctor never made an issue about it, he still doesn’t like mikl but gets plenty of Dairy in his diet from cheese and yogurt (the exception of course being chocolate milk..put chocolate in it and he’ll drink a whole gallon!) And it’s good to know there’s another big headed baby out ther, I got all worried because Aidan’s is in t he 89% percentile! And since he’s so little you, I would think it would be hard to say he’ll ALWAYS have sluggish bowels you know?

I teach 2 year olds in sunday school and can tell you that 4 out of 15 of them have HORRIBLE seperation anxiety!!!!! I mean screaming for the whole hour and won’t let either my husband or I get near them! But I see kids that I taught 3 years go who were like that and they are totally over it now!!!

The doc is annoyed that he gets ONE bottle at ONE??? Sheesh that’s good as far as I’m concerned!

September 26, 2006 at 2:18 pm #14307

hellbennt
Keymaster

no time now- but who the heck cares about the bottle?!!!! this is directed to drs & people who don’t want a toddler to suck!! not to you christine…

September 26, 2006 at 2:22 pm #14308

Anonymous
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He sounds just fine to me -you are doing a great job!!

Robin

September 26, 2006 at 2:31 pm #14312

Anonymous
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Good grief, that was a lot to take in during one appt.!

For the bottles, our ped. said they were fine up until 18 months. I would not stress too much about Myles still getting one.

For the fussiness/stranger anxiety, unless you notice other extreme behaviors over a longer period of time, I would not be too concerned. I know Seth is always a little bit more anxious and clingy when we are the doc. Maybe Myles just wasn’t himself due to the teething?

I don’t really have much advice on the other issues. We have yet to trial milk yet ourselves and to be honest, I am in no hurry as long as Seth is growing and gaining!

On the bright side, at least it sounds like your ped. took some time with you and Myles. I sometimes feel like we are rushed in and out so fast that half of my questions go unanswered.

September 26, 2006 at 2:45 pm #14317

Anonymous
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Well, for what it is worth:

1. self feeding – feeding clinics, both peds we see and Gi all said that most babies only really are 100% self feeding when they are about 18months old…. they said normally not to worry until then (obviously for Matthew we are probably talking 36months but hey!)

2. Stranger anxiety – what is wrong with your ped?? They are phases and they come and go and they sometimes overcome them and sometimes not. Matthew was extremely social as a baby. Starting at 7months or so… big time stranger anxiety. At one year old it was at its worst. I was in Spain adn i had to take care of him for 2 straight weeks because he would not let anyone touch him. Now, we are back to social, and friendly and he is even playing with all therapists.

3. Why off the bottle?? Did you ask for an explanation?? this is so strange that people assign age to bottles and an age to sippy cups or straws. First of all, let me tell you that there are plenty of breastfed babies who nurse until they are older. What, teh peds are going to say stop nursing ebcause he needs to move on to another cup??? Then there are so many kids that take a bottle at night, what you take everything away from them just because they turn 1??

4. This si what bothers me the most i think because i have a tube fed baby and nobody is expecting me to switch from formula to milk… so what is so wrong with formula? My GI said she put both her kids on pediasure rather than milk because she said toddlers are picky and that way she would not have to worry about nutrients etc… so really, there is nothing wrong with formula

5. Get some Miralax.

Really, do you trust your ped?? Why all this negativity??

Great about height and weight! Very much where Matthew was at 1 year old (but Matthew has a head about 97%!).

September 26, 2006 at 3:26 pm #14331

Anonymous
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Wow that must have been a lot to take in at one apt. It sounds like she is overreacting to me. It seems normal for a baby who has suffered from reflux to be a bit behind in some areas. I don’t think one bottle a day at just one year is a big deal.

I think you should go with you gut. You are a great mom and have had a ton of experience with kids. You would know if there was anything to worry about with Myles.

September 26, 2006 at 3:39 pm #14335

Anonymous
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Thanks everybody.

Thais,

I agree…what’s wrong with formula? I mean if he was still nursing would I have to tear him off the breast because he’s one? Normally I really do trust her, but I was really stumped today. I just don’t understand the big rush to get a 12 month old who just stopped living on breast milk to go right to whole milk and give up his only bottle of the day. That just seems wacko to me.

I think it must be the AAP that pushes this because my friend heard the same thing from her pediatrician. Her daughter was not a good eater and the ped said not only to take the bottle away but stop feeding her purees. What a mistake that was! That kid lived on toast, crackers, chicken nuggets and french fries for years because that’s all she would eat. At least with the purees they’re getting some good nutrition.

Myles was very social until about 7 or 8 months. Then he gradually became more reserved and in the last two weeks or so he’s become very anxious around people he doesn’t know or in unfamiliar situations. Don’t many babies cry at the doctor’s office? All of my kids did, even Liza who was a very social, and outgoing baby. Maybe she though it was over the top because he did it at Kindermusik, too. But last night was the first class and he didn’t know what to expect. I hope it’s just a short stage and he gets better soon like Matthew did.

Thanks for the feeding clinic info…that makes me feel better.

Jill,

I think part of Myles’ problem with food is that he is just plain stubborn. Like your son, he probably can self-feed, he just chooses not too.

So, you teach sunday school? That’s great. Do you think moms and dads should leave the screaming kids or take them out and wait until they are older? My girls won’t stay at sunday school and I always wondered if I should just leave them screaming or what.

Thanks everyone for your responses and reassurance. It really was a lousy visit and I still feel a little down about it but deep down I do think he’s fine.

September 26, 2006 at 4:01 pm #14341

Anonymous
Inactive

I very much encourage them to leave them, as long as the parent is comfortable with it, a lot of times, they don’t want to because they’re worried it’ll tick me and my husband off, but I assure them that this is my 4th year of teaching and I’ve seen it ALL!! I think it’s good for the kids with severe seperation anxiety to see the other little guys and since it IS only an hour and not all day (and only once a week!) I don’t think it hurts them, most of the time, they really scream on and off, and watch the other kids play for at least a few mins. (oh and the 4 screamers are rarely there together, some come the hour we teach one Sunday but not the next)we do have one screamer who comes every Sunday but her mom has given strict orders NOT to hold her the whole time. Our church has this pager system, and if the child is just miserable (or they think they are one of those “cry til I puke” kids) they will page the parents.

There are also a couple who scream their heads off when the parent leaves them but as soon as the door closes, they stop and go play!

Aidansmom792006-9-26 16:2:53

September 26, 2006 at 5:57 pm #14351

Anonymous
Inactive

Christine,
I think with anyone you talk to (doctors included) you need to take advice with a grain of salt. You know your child better than anyone, and every child is different and has different needs. (Heck, children within the same family are all totally different, let alone children from different families.)
You know Myles & his normal temperment. You see him every day. Your doc seems him for like 15 min. here and there. You are a great mom. Trust your instincts. My 2 year old still has stranger anxiety. He throws a fit whenever we take him to nursery in church. We end up having to leave him crying because my husband and I teach another class. We just make sure we tell him that we’ll be back. He does okay.
I see nothing wrong with him being on a bottle at 12 mo. I think that, and whether he’s on formula or milk is a personal choice, and dependent on Myles himself. You have plenty of time to wean him of formula, IMO. As for the spoon feeding, that too depends on the child, I’d say. My oldest will and has always eaten anything you give him. My 2 year old is very picky. I will still do the “spoon airplane” thing once in a while if it gets him to eat more veggies than he would on his own.
I don’t think baby food has a whole lot of fiber. Maybe once he’s eating a bigger variety of foods (raw veggies, etc) he’ll do better that way. (I really don’t know on that one).
I would keep an eye on the feeding aversion, so it doesn’t get beyond control, but I wouldn’t worry about it. I think reflux will make a lot of kids slower to start enjoying eating, & looking at eating as a completely positive experience.

Good luck with everything. I think you’re doing great.

September 26, 2006 at 9:11 pm #14368

Anonymous
Inactive

Thanks, Jill. I’ll keep that in mind the next time we go to church. (We haven’t been regular attenders in quite some time).

Thanks, Heather. I think your’re right….I know him best and I do think it’s related to his stubborness more than anything else and I think he’ll eat table food when he’s more intrested in it and he decides himself that he wants to try it. I never thought about the lack of fiber in baby food….hmmmm….I do give him oatmeal twice a day and fiber juice so I think he’s getting at least some. I tried brown rice today (pureed of course). I’ll see how he does with that. And despite what the doctor said I don’t see any reason to take him off of formula for at least a few more months. It’s certainly not hurting him and it’s more nutritious than plain milk.

September 26, 2006 at 10:13 pm #14380

Anonymous
Inactive

Christine, I can’t remember all the points you made b/c I’m on another page so sorry if I miss the main ones, but here are my thoughts.

1. If he had an oral aversion (or feeding aversion) you’d likely know it. I think in most cases it’s clear cut and obvious (but that’s just my opinion). I know many kids that are not entirely self feeding, and there’s nothing wrong with spooning purees at a year. Also, many refluxers are slower to start solids, and so many are also slower to progress with solids. If he’s eating food willingly without fighting and crying etc. (whatever that may be) and gaining well, then I’d say that you don’t have to worry. He’ll come along in his own time. I’d just be sure to offer him a variety of different textures, and hopefully he’ll pick it up as he gets more confident and skilled.

2. I wouldn’t feel the need to rush to whole milk. There’s nothing wrong with keeping him on formula. We’re still on good start 1 (not 2) because of the taste difference, and our ped is fine with that. She might even be on it until she’s two years old b/c she won’t tolerate the taste of anything new. If he’s not taking much by way of solids, then I would keep him on the formula for the nutrients.

3. DO NOT feel that you need to stop the bottle by some magic age! All kids are different. Nothing will happen if he takes one bottle a day. (Hailey is on 3, not that she’s a good frame of reference, I know) But Sarah was on two bottles at 18 months, and one bottle until she was around 30 months I believe (of homo milk). I didn’t have a problem with it, b/c the sucking was a big source of comfort for her, even then. And he’s only a year (these docs can be so harsh).

4. Regarding the social anxiety- I don’t know why your doc is making you worry. It’s a normal phase that comes and goes. And it commonly worsens around 9-12+ months. Also, crying hysterically and nonstop at the docs office is not a sign that there’s anything wrong with him… it’s probably a sign that he’s a smart kiddo and knows that nothing good happens at the doctor’s office. I know that in some cases, like Hailey’s, it can be extreme and not quite a normal response to the situation- but for us it was literally nonstop and happened with anything and everything. You’ve had a lot of experience working with children and you know what’s typical and what’s not. Look at the whole spectrum of his behaviour and I’m sure you’ll see that it’s just a phase.

5. Good news about the height, weight, and head size. That’s great.

I really hate it when docs use a by the book “magic age” approach for a lot of these things. All kids are different and should be treated individually… especially refluxers when it comes to issues of feeding etc. I just don’t feel that they follow the same rules. Trust your instincts. Myles is your third child and so you’ve been around the block enough to know what’s right. Don’t let your doc make you second guess that. It sounds to me like he’s doing great (and so cute and on track in his pics!)

September 27, 2006 at 12:22 pm #14415

Anonymous
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Lori,

I know what you mean…..I’ve been around the block a few times, been a nanny, worked in daycare, had three of my own, but I sometimes fear I may lose objectivity when it comes to my own children. She just made me feel so bad yesterday. I know it wasn’t her intent and she probably has no idea I left there feeling like a lousy mother.

Anyway, I thought and thought and thought about this all night last night (got basically no sleep at all ).

I think I know why he’s so behind in the eating thing. It’s not really an oral or feeding aversion, it’s just that he got a much later start than other babies due to his severe reflux and gag reflex. Up until 9 months of age he was still puking constantly, and until 10 months he gagged on everything and anything that got into his mouth, so I could not give him any table foods. He’s really only been experimenting with finger foods for a short time (about a month or six weeks). The other thing is that I do feed him on a schedule, same time, same thing basically everyday because it keeps his bowels moving. Maybe that doesn’t allow him to get hungry enough to try new foods. I may have to stop that soon, but I fear he will get consitpated without his spoon fed fluids/fruits/veggies. KWIM?

My little pumpkin must have known I was worried about him because this morning he ate a big handful of cheerios, and at lunch another fistful plus some puffs. The boy definitely can eat if he wants too. I’m going to try some more finger foods later and see how he does.

Oh, and I’m defintely keeping him on the goodstart 2 and the one bottle until I feel he’s ready to move on.

Thanks for your support and advice.
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